Resolutions

Okay so, I’m going away to Collie for the next week and it’s over like New Years and whatnot and it’s not like this is a dedicated blog but I want to post my (so far) New Years Resolutions somewhere because I feel as though if they exist somewhere I’m more inclined to stick to it. This year is like completely new like I don’t know what to do with myself but hopefully it’s a good one. Anyway so far I’ve got zilch money and owe quite a bit to parents and whatnot. So at the moment I’m thinking:

1) I want to work more, proper hours

2) I want to go to uni and actually do well

3) I want to stop dressing to impress and just do whatever the fuck I want

I feel like now that high school’s over I can stop feeling like I need to justify my choices and I can like what I want, be who I want, none of that expectation bs. Now it’s time to do what I want and it’s up to me to make things happen. 

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Silence

Write about a noise – or even a silence, that won’t go away. I read this and automatically my mind flew to another time. It was a long while ago. Now a lot of my memories consist of boys and although I’ll remember them in vivid detail I don’t want this to be conveyed as still meaningful as anything more than a memory. But I still remember the quiet of everything but the pool cleaner and the dog panting on the other side of the gate as we stood mere inches from each other face to face, we’d move as if to kiss but stay apart without touching. The surrounding noises disappeared into a fierce silence that we both shared as be stared intently at one another. This silence, I could feel it growing louder in my head and all that I could concentrate on was his face. This silence continued until he grabbed me and spun me round. This silence continues in my head, like a recurring dream but one you don’t necessarily want to revisit.